The Library

"It was so strange, Rachel. I can't understand it..." she whispered, one hane pressed against her still-tingling abdomen with her other hand wrapped tight in Rachel's. She wasn't trembling and she didn't feel dizzy, but she felt close to both. It was just... It was just so strange! He'd never looked at her like that before, with his eyes all hot and staring. No one had ever looked at her like that before! "It was like he... Rachel, it was like he knows what I look like without my clothes on!"

"Jessalyn, not so loud!"

"I can't help it! You should have seen it! You'd be loud too!"

Rachel's grip on her hand tightened and she quickly pulled Jessalyn into another corner farther off down the hall, looking around cautiously to make sure no one else was around who could hear. "Well, I thought you wanted him to look at you like that? Didn't you? I remember, last night you had Hattie set out this pink dress you've got on now, you said that the color looks good on you... And I do seem to remember when Mr. Eric was down here for the spring barbeques, you didn't mind him looking at you so much then..."

"Well, it was different then, Rachel! His eyes weren't so... intense. They weren't so hungry, so burning..."Her voice trailed off into nothing and she closed her eyes for a moment, and Rachel was just opening her mouth to say something when a light voice with a slight French accent floated towards them from around a corner.

"Rachel, come sing to me again. That church song, the one you sang for us last Christmas..."

Both girls sighed at the words. "Its your mother... I have to go. She's always been kind to me, I don't want to risk that..."

Jessalyn looked down and nodded quickly, letting go of Rachel's hand and taking a deep breath. "No, I understand. It's alright. Go on, go on. I'll talk to you tonight? Maybe?" Rachel nodded at her, then touched her shoulder one last time before she walked past her and turned the corner to go into Mistress Larocque's private sitting room. Jessalyn felt bare and cold without her friend with her, but... She drew in a deep breath and imagined physically putting her head back on her shoulders where it belonged instead of rolling around up in the clouds, and then she let out her breath and walked forward. Alright. Alright, she said to herself, no more of that. She'd talk to Eric about it the next time they were alone, he'd provide a perfectly logical explanation, she'd feel like a fool for thinking it was something so serious, and it'd all be over. Yes... Yes, that was it. She walked back to her room and brushed her hair a little, being careful not to undo the curls from her hair or snag her dangling pearl earrings. She fixed the way the lace was laying across the top of her dress and then set the cameo necklace to lie on her chest properly, then she looked herself over in the mirror one more time before leaving her room and heading back towards the study. But she wasn't going to bother her father and brother again. No, she'd... She'd go down to the library. Yes, that was it. The library! She had always found sanctuary there, and she did again now. She went inside it and firmly shut both the doors, grabbing a book she'd read a hundred times and opening it again, sitting in the same chair she'd sat in since she was five years old. Naturally, she finished the book in only a few hours, sliding it back into its place on the shelf, but as she was leaving the library she saw her brother coming down the stairs and then heading outside. The meeting was over... Eric would be coming down soon... She quickly shut the door more, but not entirely, cracking it just enough that she could watch out of it and wait for him to go past so she could freely go back upstairs. But minutes passed, the clock in the entrance hall chimed the hour, and still he didn't come down. He must still be with her father, discussing last-minute things... Which meant if she hurried, she could make it to her room or her mother's room without seeing him...